Anything Mello Can Do Near Can Do Better
by lazsmith
Summary: I did this for fun. I DO NOT OWN DEATH NOTE OR ANY CHARACTERS. I DO NOT OWN THIS SONG EITHER.


Near walked into the classroom and saw Mello at his desk looking at his test paper. Near smiled knowing Mello was fuming that Near had gotten a higher score then him again. Near walked over a mischievous grin on his face.

"Mello you need to accept it," Near said sitting across from him.

"What?" Mello spat.

"Anything you can do I can do better," Near said with a smile.

"Ha!" Mello snorted.

"I can do anything better than you,"

"No you can't," Mello refused to let Near get away with saying that to him.

"Yes I can,"

"No you can't"

"Yes I can,"

"No you can't!"

"Yes I can," Near grinned. "Yes I can,"

He walked out of the room then and Mello feeling quite pissed off ran after him.

"Anything you can be I can be greater sooner or later I'm greater than you," Mello said walking behind Near.

"No you're not," Near said.

"Yes I am,"

"No you're not,"

"Yes I am,"

Near sighed. "No you're not,"

"Yes I am yes I am!" Mello shouted. "I can shoot a partridge with a single cartridge,"

Near rolled his eyes. "I can get a sparrow with a bow and arrow,"

"I can live on bread and cheese,"

Near gave him a sceptical look. "And only on that?"

"You bet," Mello said trying not to think of chocolate.

"So can a rat,"

Mello gritted his teeth but kept following Near into the lounge. "Any note you can sing I can sing higher,"

"I can sing any note higher than you,"

"No you can't," Mello sang.

"Yes I can," Near sang back.

"No you can't,"

"Yes I can,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can," Near's voice went higher than Mello's could making Mello fume even more.

"How do you sing that high?" He asked crossing his arms.

Near smiled. "I'm a girl,"

Mello stopped and looked at Near. He knew it!

"Anything you can say I can say softer," Mello went on determined not to give up.

"I can say anything softer than you,"

"No you can't," Mello said making his voice go soft.

"Yes I can," Near said doing the same.

"No you can't,"

"Yes I can,"

"No you can't,"

"Yes I can, Yes I can," Near walked into the kitchen to get a drink with Mello still following him.

Mello spotted the wine rack. "I can drink my liquor faster than a flicker,"

Near rolled his eyes. "I can drink it quicker and get even sicker,"

"I can open any safe," Mello grinned.

Near's eyes went wide. "Without getting caught?"

Mello's grin went wider. "You bet,"

"That's what I thought you crook,"

Mello made a face then thought of something else. "Any note you can hold I can hold longer,"

Near wondered when Mello was going to give up. "I can hold any note longer than you,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can, yes, IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII can!"

Mello sighed he had to hand it to Near he held that last note for a long time. "Yes, you can," He and Near sat down at the kitchen table. "Where do you hold all that air?" Mello asked.

Near shrugged and gestured at his chest making Mello roll his eyes

Then Mello thought of something else "Anything you can say I can say faster,"

Oh for… Near sighed "I can say anything faster than you,"

"Noyoucan't," Mello said the words blending into one.

"YesIcan," Near spoke quicker.

"Noyoucan't,"

"YesIcan,"

"Noyoucan't,"

"YesIcan,"

"Noyoucan't,"

"YesIcan,"

Mello frowned and then did a running leap over the chair and smiled when he cleared it. That's something Near couldn't do!

"I can jump a hurdle," He pointed out.

"I can wear a girdle," Near grinned.

Mello looked at him "I can knit a sweater,"

"I can fill it better," Near said thinking of his comments about being a girl earlier.

"I can do most anything,"

"Can you bake a pie?" Near asked curious.

"No," Mello admitted

"Neither can I," Near shrugged

"Anything you can sing I can sing sweeter,"

"I can sing anything sweeter than you,"

"No, you can't," Mello sang sweetly.

"Yes, I can," Near's voice got a gentle melody tone to it.

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can,"

"No, you can't,"

"Yes, I can,"

"No, you can't, can't, can't," Mello said getting even more frustrated than he was at the start of this argument.

"Yes, I can, can, can, can," Near said having decided he was bored of this fight now.

"No, you can't!"

"Yes, I can!"

Matt walked into the kitchen holding a game in his hands. He looked up and saw Mello and Near. Mello looked pissed and Near looked bored. They had been arguing again. Matt rolled his eyes. "Oh for god's sake you two, will you just give it a rest," He said slumping down on the sofa.

Mello pulled a face. "He started it," He said pointing at Near.

Near pulled an innocent face. "I don't know what Mello is talking about,"

He turned and left the room leaving Mello staring at him in disbelief. That bloody bastard!


End file.
